We Wear A Mask

 

mask

We wear a mask, a mask that can only us for the day as we realize our true self is not to he visible to people. We wear a mask to hide our emotions from the general public to disappear from the criticism that is instilled upon us. We wear a mask that other’s fear, but we see no changes in personalities. The mask that we wear earns all the love from people, but none of that same love is shown to our true self. If we were to reveal our true-selves away from the mask all that love that was earned would quickly die away. We wear a mask that would fulfill the pleasure in the eyes of the judges but none of those pleasures are to please the eye of the beholder. We mask we wear is a new mask every old mask takes the day of cracks and wreckage of war pulled to screw us over. No each mask keeps us from falling off the bridge we seek to reach but truly reach it with pure true self. We wear a mask to shelter our pain, to keep our judging mouths to a minimum. We wear a mask to stop killing joke that never sounds funny. We wear a mask to hide our kindness to protest our weakness but mistaken it for spite instead of strength. We wear a mask until it becomes part of us, a mask that never really reveal the darkest secret and the scarcity of our lives.

We wear a mask to ride the killing joke, to follow the world’s broken trends. We wear a mask to lose ourselves in what we do. A mask to forget who we truly are. We wear a mask to pull ourselves out of the graves that’s been buried six feet under our hate and wretchedness. We wear a mask that throws our a fishing line to hide our anger from the next victim to pass on what we’ve been given although the next victim never deserves it. We wear a mask that pulls a man’s heart out of the depths of darkness, as a woman whose purified and broken descends from the heaven. “Did it hurt when you fell from the sky?” Ask the man from the darkness, no the woman says. “But it does hurt when you touch me at all, you’re words or unkind and whatever poison ales you must be released to be full hearted again. You’re mask is already broken and your emotions are dripping through similar to blood.” You attempt to take the old mask off but it refuses. It sinks into your skin, it remains apart of you, so a new mask you put on, and another mask and another mask and another final mask is put on. But still no sense of the true self-given any love.

Every crack, every stain, every bruise and whole give to these masks are the results of war. Every time wasted and effort blown up to the nothingness, was thrown back into the hole that plunge six feet under. We wear a mask to ride the perfect storm of a broken societal prophecy that’s been given to us.

We masked our faces for the given templates we continue to anger and hate what is uncontrollable, but what can still be controlled continues to be hated and angered towards us. Throw a few needles it lights a fire in a haystack. Skip a few rocks and trip into the river, have a few good shots and land behind a dumpster. We wear masks to hide our emotions, to hide are broken feelings. We wear masks to hide our defenses from those who think they seem to know us. We wear a mask, a mask that can only us for the day as we realize our true self is not to he visible to people.

Escaping Pain and Murder

escape

She sits in the dark, she tries to reach for the light, she falls and trips, but gets back up. The light distance itself farther and farther from her, they tell her perfection is what we want and it’s not what you have. So back away, back away into the darkness, back away from the goals you’ve built up, back away from every good thing that you’ve known. No matter what you say you’re not perfect and perfection is what we want. Broken is what you are and fear is what you’re made up. Bravery is what you lack and soul is what you’re losing, she screams internally as loud as she can because in her reality, everyone is going about their business like there’s really nothing is happening. She’s got everything going  for her, she’s got the best of friends, the best of family and has nothing to hide. Her mind screams internally screams at her telling she lacks the perfection, the precision to be on the spot, to be the right person for anyone to see as a good person.

She sees her faults but her faults aren’t flaws their her personality. She disagrees with all the positive feed back and makes all kinds of silence in her reality. She holds on to what she can but forgets the rest of move on, she burns her brain to forget the voices that stop her from running, the voices that stop her from speaking, the voices that stop her from trying, the voices that stop her from being the person she wants to be. She tries to reach from for the light, she falls a thousand feet per second, and she sees a mirror. She sees her reflection in the mirror but that’s not her, she sees the person in the mirror, she sees they’re covered, covered in scars, covered in regrets, covered in pain that continuously revives, continuously breaks her confidence, and then again she’s told she lacks perfection She lacks the personality to be herself. She remembers that the reflection in the mirror isn’t her, that’s not who she is, that’s not where she is at in this moment. She had nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, she wasn’t alive when she was lonely. She a figment of imagination from the piece of spec to the human eye.

She drags herself across the floor, because her feet won’t let her move she pulls herself with her arms, because her legs won’t help her feet move. She scratches dirt to pick herself up, and attempts to stand up, but feels a blow to her back. She falls again in agonizing pain, and a get she pulls herself up from the dirt, again another blow to her face. She’s been beaten bruised and thrown on her back, she lands on her knees, then stands back up. She receives a blow to the face, and lands back on the floor. But she still forces herself to stand up, and takes another blow straight to the chest where her weak heart is found. She falls again, and screams in excruciating pain, from the last hit to her chest. She stops moving and her whole body freeze not being able to move. She begins to internally scream, “Get the fuck up, get the fuck up, get the fuck up, you need to move, you can’t stay here. Get up now!!!” She keeps to screaming herself constantly, “Get the fuck up, you need to keep moving, they’re fucking coming back to kill you, get the fuck up already.” “Look, I know you’re hurt, tired, and can’t take this anymore, but that’s the reason why I need you to get back up and start running like there’s God damn tomorrow!”

She begs herself, “Please fucking get up we’re almost at the light, I swear once we’re in the light we’ll be fucking safe I promise, but right now we need to get here and we need to move. We need to leave, we need to get far away as possible because Pain and Murder are coming they will kill you! This has taken too long and we should have left long time a go, and this is our only fucking chance to leave.” She forces her weak-hearted, beaten and bruised body to gain one last strength to run to the light, before Pain and Murder come back after her, she escapes to the light and escapes every path that would leave any kinds of traces to the light. She reaches the light and finally lets out a breath of relief, she sees her bruises disappear and her heart is no longer weak, but stronger than ever.

High Spirits and Low Pains

spirit

Drown yourself, that’s what they say, you have nothing to live for. Drown yourself, that’s what they say, you have nothing left to keep up with. Drown yourself, that’s what they say, no one wants anything to do with you. Drown yourself, that’s what they say, there’s nothing that will change people’s minds to see you as a good person. Drown yourself, that’s what they say, happiness isn’t what you need since you’re a lost cause. Drown yourself, that’s what they say, you have nothing and you are nothing. Drown yourself that’s what they say because there is noting in your life to be worth living for. Drown yourself, that’s what they say, you mean nothing to them. Drown yourself, that’s what they say, nothing will ever go right for you. Drown yourself, your not a thrill for people as a person anymore. Drown yourself, that’s what they said, you’re both meaningless and hopeless. Drown yourself, that’s what those voices say, but yet I’m still here looking at myself wondering why am I bothered with at all?

Fall apart, that’s what they want, they don’t know your strength or weakness. they don’t know that you do belong some where, they don’t see the love that’s wrapped around you, the love that’s brought you so far from the dark areas of your life. Fall apart, that’s what they want to see, down goes all of your happiness, down goes all of your smiles, down goes all of the hard work that you’ve done to accomplish in everything you’ve fought for. Fall apart, that’s what they want, up goes all the pain that you’ve gained. Built up stronger all the pain and anger that you have growing on you. Build it high, all the pain inside, that fiery hate you have starting to light red. Burn all the good things that you’ve ever known, burn all the memories that’s brought you to a good place. Burn it all, that’s what they want, that’s what all the voices say.

They don’t know you, they think they do. They don’t want to see you successful, they don’t want to see you be happy, they don’t want  to see you be a better person. They want you to fall, fall apart and drown yourself, they want to you break down to pieces and not be able to come back strong.